There is such a list for how to answer this question. Depending on how it’s asked too it can be the most uplifting encouraging thing you ever respond on or make you feel lower that the depths of the ocean. How often do we use this simple question to uplift or take down ourselves and others?
When I started focusing on the word GROW I quickly realized how much I was hindering my own growth by how I asked myself questions. For instance, this year I wanted to focus on losing some weight. I started out in January very strongly and lost couple pounds right away. Then late January I had some work trips come up and I caught a cold. By mid-February it was back at square one and I was not motivated to start again. What I caught myself doing was asking myself in a very negative way “how could you?” Or another thing I was saying was ” why not?” It wasn’t that I was asking these questions but HOW I was asking them that was demotivating me. I felt beat up by myself like I was calling myself a fat loser for not getting back on the diet wagon as soon as I was over my cold.
I’m not saying you can’t lose weight by being hard on yourself but long term is that really the best way? Most of us do not respond well to a negative mode of motivation that is meant to be encouraging. We are really not built to feel bad about ourselves as a way to promote doing better. The problem though is not only what we are doing to limit and tear ourselves down but how much of that comes off to other people around us. Are we saying similar negative things to others in the same way unintentionally? The truth is when we don’t feel good about ourselves inside or out we can very easily take that out on other people in equal amounts to what we are doing to ourselves.
If you follow me on social media you know I have a monthly 2020 Wellness Challenge going on all this year. Each month has a theme, for instance May is GROW, and I use that to encourage you to define what that means for you and your health. There are monthly challenges where we spend time working on activities that are mostly aimed at our mental well-being, changing our outlook and being aware of how we feel in different situations. Yes there are some physical things in there too but most of it is stuff everyone can do in the course of exploring better health. The premise behind these is exactly getting at how we limit our own health improvement and desires in life by how we see and feel ourselves. There is no question when we feel our best we are drawn to things that are healthier for us in every area of our life.
That tone and manner in which I was asking myself why I wasn’t doing more and being more strict with myself was not building me up to feel my best. I felt guilty, shameful and like a fat loser literally because I had failed. The truth is I didn’t fail at all. I didn’t need my inner voice telling me I wasn’t good enough over it either. Too often I think we give in to that inner voice and get wrapped around thinking we can’t do anything. We’re too old, fat, lazy, motivated, stressed, tired, and insert your favorite excuse word here. We literally stand in our own way of what could be some of the best experiences of our life.
I don’t like roller coasters. I rode them once when I was teen. It was one that went upside down in a spiral. When I got off the ride the rest of my day was spent puking and I couldn’t stop being dizzy. I wish I loved riding them. I wish I could get on anything and just enjoy the wind, whips and tilts. That experience has limited me from ever doing it again. How many experiences in our life have we gone through that wasn’t pleasant and it’s become a limit we place on ourselves the rest of our life? Or we get to a certain age where we believe we’re not supposed to do, feel, dress or look a certain way anymore?
Part of this GROW concept we’ve been exploring this month involves assessing if these limits we’ve self-imposed are truly doing what is right for us. Were they placed there with fear, bad experiences, culture or society say so or just because we didn’t know what else to do at that time? Would removing them open up new possibilities and a life you crave deep inside?
If that limit wasn’t in your way what would you be doing? How you be living? What would you feel like?
So my friend in the kindness tone and sincerity of love I ask you, how can you? How can you remove those old ways of thinking and living to allow some fresh growth to enter your life? How can you move in the direction of your true calling and experience life on a new level?
How can you live your best life more naturally?
If you’re ready to explore what that can mean, I invite you to take the free Lifestyle & Wellness Questionnaire: https://forms.gle/kKJ7UV7Kcqo9coDw6