I notice changes the most when I am resisting them. When there’s something I’m not wanting to do or that I don’t think I’m ready for but that is necessary. The resistance is of my own doing of course and things would be a lot easier if I just went with them. More than anything I resist because I think not doing so means giving up the controls. After all it’s my life shouldn’t I at least be in charge of it?
There are several sayings for it. Roll with the punches. Flow with the changes. Move with instead of against the wind. All of them indicating it is easier to move in flow with life than against it. While true the path, direction and sometimes just what they are doing doesn’t feel in alignment with where we wanted to go. Like going with that tide of change would take us off course from our goals or change them entirely. Sometimes that happens too, other times it leads us closer than we imagined. We never really know until after wards most of the time.
A large part of living naturally is moving with nature. At first I admit it feels counterintuitive, much like rolling with changes. What I realized though in my own journey is the awkwardness is often because it goes against what I’ve learned in how things are supposed to happen. There’s a big difference in so many things when you look at the supposed to do and happen versus the what actually happens and what feels right for you. That difference becomes glaring when we start aligning to moving more naturally in our life.
I have found when I let go of the societal supposed to thinking I actually feel incredible freedom and can see more clearly what is right for me. In my own experience I feel more in control of my life and less concerned with what others may think about it too. The awkwardness gives way to letting my true self emerge and moving into things that fit me better and more comfortably. I feel like myself and I am not as stressed, exhausted or overwhelmed by life. The demands on my shoulders didn’t change. I still have to work to provide for the family. There’s still laundry and housework but I feel like I can manage them because my mindset and perspective about those changes has changed. I see their purpose and need but I feel in control of how I get them done.
Where I notice this most is in my corporate career. Let’s face it, not many of us feel in control of much of anything in the workplace. We are in back to back meetings all day and still have a full inbox and other things that need to be done. We have metrics we must meet and deadlines to come in at. Yet when I see these things in the eyes of being in flow with changes and nature I see a lot more calmness. I can approach my work level headed, focused and even motivated by it. The bigger picture of what that job provides for me stays in front and I can move with the changes knowing each change, deadline, frustrating situation is not only helping my family and I financially but letting me learn how to flow better.
I think it’s great to be ambitious and want to move up the corporate ladder but most of the time our motivation for doing so is the pursuit of money, recognition and status. These things are not bad but if they are our only motivator then we are likely to miss the journey of getting to the top as well as enjoying it when we get there. Somewhere we have tied our ability to live well with a big salary. Sure more money makes things more comfortable but it doesn’t make it more fulfilling necessarily. It doesn’t mean we won’t have bills or debt. It doesn’t mean we will have love in our life, friends we connect with deeply or even happiness.
Yet when we see the job as necessary yet find one that meets our needs and feeds our purpose we feel happier. It very often is not the job with the highest salary, biggest office or special parking spot either. It is the job that we enjoy being with people who share laughs with us during the day, that we find ourselves smiling when we hear their voices or is just pleasant and comfortable. When we shift to looking at what is right for us and what feels best we often find the greatest jobs of our life possible. We stop feeling the pressure and can enjoy our life more.
We see opportunities and can select which ones are right for us rather than chasing something that we feel we are supposed to want. Imagine being happy in your work!
Now I will not say that every workplace is free of toxic people or that it is even a fun place to be. Let’s be real there are a lot of crappy bosses, sabotaging people and just plain ugliness in our workplaces. These situations don’t go away just because we start to see that ugliness or we wake up one day and want to live naturally. What changes is how we deal with it. We begin to see other people’s manipulation and misery as things we don’t need to accept into our own being. We begin to see that maybe that isn’t the right place for us and we can feel empowered to explore other options. We let go of feeling it is our own only choice. We begin to move with the changes nature has been telling us we need all along.
It feels good to shed what doesn’t feel good. I like to see it as wearing this super heavy long coat that is soaking wet. When I finally realize how it is slowing me down and doesn’t feel good against my skin I take it off. I shed what doesn’t feel good and build, create, look for, try on, explore what is right for me. I also realize that sometimes you have to wear it awhile to find out if it is a perfect fit and if it’s now we need to shed it once again. When we approach things in our life in the interest of what feeds our soul, makes us feel beautiful, confident, valuable, smart, and our best self we find we don’t wear the heavy wet coats any longer than we have to. We flow better with changes that come our way because we realize it isn’t for us and we can move on easier.
Changes are scary though right? We don’t like change because it includes risk, unknowns, and uncertainty. What if we fail? What if we choose wrong? In my own experience when we are moving with nature in pursuit of what is right for us we never fail. We begin to see changes as welcomed seasons that help us even further become who we were meant to be and what makes us feel our best. It becomes less about failing and more about trying as much and as many new things as possible. We become driven by our own desire to find perfect fits for what is right for us and less concerned with how others describe as us not knowing what we want in life or not going after what they think we should.
When things easily fall in place for us is the best way to describe the sensation of moving in flow with changes. We may all want that feeling, and for things to feel less hard, less of a struggle and less stressful but when we see that it requires us to let loose of resistance and controlling all the details we feel fear. Surely it cannot be that easy. How will we know the tide will carry where we want to go? Isn’t this akin to us not caring what happens in our life? In my own experience with it, I feel it brings us closer to what we really want and it is always a perfect hit on where. Often it is things we didn’t even realize we wanted too.
The only way to realize these things is to move in flow with changes. Let changes be the tide we ride and see where it takes us. Finally being able to enjoy the journey of life instead of letting us beat us down, feeling as if we are failures and not good enough to deserve better. Digging deeply into our own being of what we truly want in our life and seeing that change is only helping us get there. So much of change is our own manifestation of pursuing our goals and dreams. When we are aligned to what is right for us then change will help us achieve it.
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