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The Beauty of a No

Updated: Aug 28, 2019

Posted on August 13, 2019 by dragonspitapothecary

Being able to continually hear “no” and have people miss appointments and generally just not respond or show up is a tough skill to master in a small business. It is a very humbling experience that can rock even the most positive of outlooks. When someone doesn’t show up and won’t respond when you follow up it can hurt personally and in your business. We can start to feel jaded about people and think there are no polite people left in the world.

However, that simply is not true. There are wonderful people in the world and there are yes answers. There are people who will show up and that will keep their appointments or hold their parties or classes. They will be interested in what you are offering and they will say yes. It is however very difficult sometimes to find these people but the high of that encounter is what often carries us forward until we can find another just like them.


No is a harsh word. It’s small but imprints a negative message to a question, opportunity, or situation. If you have a direct sales business you will hear this word more than any 2 year old toddler will ever say it. This simple small word will continually pound on your self-esteem until it makes you question if you were really sane to even consider you could sell anything.

One of the first skills to develop in your small business is learning how to manage this word. It does not have to be entirely negative and it doesn’t have to the sign the end is here before it even began.

If you were hiring someone to do a project for you, would you like for someone to say yes and then do a crummy poor job? No of course you wouldn’t want that!If someone told you yes they were interested in joining your team and building a business but then they never did anything to actually build a business would you want that in your model? Would you want the stress of trying to motivate, follow up, encourage, coach and get frustrated because they said yes but didn’t really mean it? No, you don’t want that in your business! Certainly not on your frontline of your doTERRA business!If someone said they were interested in your product and wanted to meet but then they spent the whole time on their phone and talking to everyone but you would you still think it was worth your time? No! This is worse than if they didn’t show up at all.

Sometimes it’s ok to hear no. If someone tells you no sometimes they are doing you a favor! Sure it still hurts and it won’t bring sales volume in but it does something much better for you:

You are free to find other people and not spend any more time pursuing dead ends

No didn’t create ill will towards each other

No creates the opportunity to follow up in the future where maybe they will say yes!

No is not a permanently shut door unless someone says they never want to hear about it again. If they say that, respect it but most people who say no don’t go that far. No is an opportunity to create an opening for follow up in the future. Your skill at communicating gets them to agree that while it is no right now are they open to talking about it at another time.

No Shows

I cannot tell you the number of people who have said they wanted to meet or have a class and then didn’t follow through or even show up! I used to get pretty frustrated at making time to connect, following up and confirming date, time and place only to find myself sitting alone at Starbucks with a last minute sorry can’t make it text.

It used to boggle my mind to think how many people have “emergencies” that result in them canceling on me last minute or worse yet not even letting me know they won’t be coming! I would immediately follow up but often get no response. Or I would be too nice and just say it’s ok and never take the right next action. Instead I was sitting there with my coffee thinking their not showing up was seriously one of the rudest things I’ve ever encountered in this business. I was not taking responsibility for my role in that at all because I was there early and ready.

We do however have a role in why a person doesn’t show up for appointments. First, by them not showing up, regardless of the last minute text or not, it is exactly like being told no and no can be a beautiful thing (see previous section). Second, there are 3 possibilities as to why the didn’t show up and 2 of them are my responsibility.

They really did have an emergency didn’t deliver a compelling value proposition that interested them to the point they saw this appointment as super important on their schedule didn’t follow up enough or in the right way

Value to Them

When people see what you have is valuable, can truly help them and they are ready to work on or fix their problem they will purchase from you. They will come for you and these are the very best kind of customers to have in your business!

People have to want to change before they’re going to purchase. They have to be so sick and tired of being sick and tired that they are ready and open to dealing with what is going on for them. Your job is to help guide them to recognize these problems and help them realize it is time to deal with them. The bottom line though is they have to own that problem, want to fix it and be committed to doing it on their timetable.

If you want people to show up and even be early waiting on you then you need to have a strong value proposition that speaks to them and how what you have can help them. Well before you set an appointment to sell you need to be generating conversations to learn what problems people have. That is so easy because everyone has problems and everyone loves to talk about themselves. Master the skill of being an excellent listener and asking questions to get them to talk more about their problems and what’s important to them. Your business is that of being a researcher of people.

Being a researcher of people means you are continually asking people questions to learn about them. Always focus on their needs and get strong in identifying when they are ready to act on working on them. Until they are ready all they are doing is talking but that talking is keeping you in touch with them and creating follow up opportunities that will eventually lead to an appointment for you to make that sale. By the time you get to an appointment to show them your products and services they are ready. They are there before you with credit card in hand.

Follow Up

Learning to follow up and confirm details is super important to reduce the likelihood of no shows but even when you execute those perfectly people will still not show up and that is ok because it becomes the rarity and not the norm. Often we personally don’t do enough follow up and we assume our message with the person are firm.

Don’t miss an opportunity because you assumed someone knew the time, date and place!

Make your appointment so important that they don’t want to miss it. Give them the value, importance and urgency without the pressure of sales. It is about the connection, communication and conversation. It is about exploring if the product or service you offer is right for them. It is about creating the next opportunity to talk if they say no now but it starts with making sure you continue to follow up!

Interested in more?

If you’re ready to start your own business and are looking for a supportive team, great company culture and the world’s best natural products then we welcome you to check us out! We love having others join us who are interested in growing, learning and succeeding together to help improve our lives and those of our beloved customers!

If you have questions or would like more information please reach out. doTERRA’s culture is unlike any other direct sales company and their products are the best on the market. Reach out to ask any questions and see if this is the right fit for you.

Contact me!

If you’re ready to start your natural health journey and share it with others then step one is to get our business packs full of exactly what you need and support to execute smoothly.

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