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Balancing the Scale of Self-Love and Self-Improvement

Updated: Sep 4, 2019

One of the reasons so many of us fail at keeping resolutions is because we try to insert something into our lives that doesn’t fit with the rest. For instance, we purchase a gym membership because we want to lose a few pounds but then find our schedules are not flexible for us to go when we want or on any type of regularity.

Many people would insert the trendy words “balance” or “priority” to solve that ill-fit situation but I think this issue deserves something deeper. See we can’t just say we’re going to balance our demands better and place appropriate priority on all of them so we have a perceived increase in time to practice self-love. That doesn’t work at all and ends up with you feeling like you are being pulled in a million different directions and not being fulfilled by any of them.

So what is self-love?

Self-love is an act of accepting and appreciating all of you – physically, emotionally and spiritually. Sure there are things each of us would like to improve or change about ourselves but true self-love accepts where you are in this moment with an appreciation that you beautiful, worthy and capable.

Can you say that to and about yourself…. and mean it?


It of course means you have to like yourself, even when you don’t feel like it. You have to like yourself, even when you find those new gray hairs or your clothes are feeling a little snug. When you love yourself, it doesn’t mean you don’t want to improve, it simply means you accept where you are right now with love and grace and without judgement, negativity or criticism.

There is a fine line between self-love and balancing self-improvement.

Where we get into trouble is when our pursuit of self-improvement tramples our self-esteem and destroys our sense of self-love. We begin to feel incapable, unsure, unworthy and undeserving. These are the “not good enough” thoughts that come into our minds and destroy our motivation and heart’s desires.

Practicing self-love can sometimes seem li